This is not a “how-to” for the smoker. This is a “how-to” for people whose loved one smokes.
So I stopped smoking. Exactly how I always knew it would stop.
As nearly 100 % of the smokers, I started smoking in my teens. My friends were smoking, and I heard it made managing emotions easier. That wasn’t true. Not only did it not help dampen the emotions but also added the stress of bullying. (Did you notice that bullying is not ok unless the bullied person is fat or a smoker?)
I hid my smoking. I got really good at choosing places and angles to not get much of the smell on me or my clothes. But then someone would at some point shout really loudly and triumphantly “UGH! Who has been smoking!! It stinks!!”
I tried to explain to people that people who were just having a smoke a few minutes ago are exactly the ones who don’t need the added stress of being called out. But, you know how people are when they know they have an infallible argument. They yelled over me “SMOKING IS BAD FOR YOU.” Some even laughed.
I hid my smoking even better, and it’s been a few weeks since someone called me out in public.
And, just like that, I found myself not smoking.
I’m not saying this is something your loved one needs in order to stop smoking. Some people do need to be nagged into quitting. But it is very important that you nag because that’s what’s helpful for that person not because you need an outlet for your frustration of that person’s smoking. And the fact you can’t control their smoking.